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Post by jackorion on May 31, 2015 8:32:15 GMT
Hey folks. As some of you may recall, about July last year I started to have some issues with my Fylde, in that it seemed to develop a buzz that couldn't be traced. Eventually the guitar went back to Roger and his team for a fret dress, which didn't solve the issue I had and introduced some other issues I was not very happy with. The guitar went back again and I journeyed up to Penrith from Devon to speak to Roger face to face and demonstrate the issue I was having to him. Between us we decided that the guitar needed a refret and this was done very quickly and professionally and returned to me. However the guitar still didn't feel right to me and, whilst everything had been going on, I had started to use my Martin again and had an LR Baggs Anthem SL installed so I could start playing open mics, and had become really used to the Martin's sound (both unplugged and plugged in) as well as the feel. The Martin had always been my 'first love' so to speak, and being forced through circumstance to play it exclusively for a while reminded me of how much that guitar meant to me, as it was my 'dream' guitar when I bought it. For some reason I just couldn't get on with the Fylde again, but figured I just needed to re-bond with it. Then, a week or two after the re-fretted guitar was returned to me, I discovered my wife had been having an affair for the majority of the previous year, and we separated. I left the house with a bag of clothes, my computer, and my Martin. As it turned out once I left I realised that we were both pretty unhappy, and that separating was the best thing for both of us, and, as part of my new life living in Exeter, I started to play out regularly. I started off using the Martin live and got some great compliments on it, and decided to have a pickup put into the Fylde as well. Because of the small bridge plate in the Fylde, I couldn't fit my first choice of pickup (the LR Baggs), so I compromised on the DTAR Multi-Source, but I found I didn't like it plugged in as much as the Martin, plus I still wasn't getting on with the setup for some reason, and ended up having the guitar looked at and tweaked a few times until it started to feel a little better. All the while I was playing my Martin everyday, writing new songs on it, and getting on with the process of getting divorced and moving on with my life. The Fylde is now setup to play fantastically, and it still sounds great, but, for one reason or another, the issues I had that resulted in it being refretted, my dissatisfaction with it afterwards and my personal situation with the affair and subsequent divorce all seem to be inter-connected in my mind and, every time I pick the guitar up, I noodle for a couple of minutes and then put it away and get the Martin out, and end up playing for much, much longer. Now I know I posted this thread just over a year ago: acousticsoundboard.co.uk/thread/2832/guitar-spoil-another which, ironically, talks about me never playing the Martin because the Fylde was so much better and more comfortable to play, but this seems like a different issue to me, it's almost as if the Fylde represents a particular time in my life, my marriage (it was ordered on my honeymoon, arrived within my first year of marriage, and then had 'issues' as the marriage fell apart), that has now come to an end and it seems part of that old life whereas the Martin seems to be from before then, and afterwards, if you understand what I mean? I don't want to do anything that I might regret, but it's been a good 10 months now that I've had this dissatisfaction with the Fylde for one reason or another, and I've played a few guitars recently (a Martin 0018v and a Patrick James Eggle Etowah) that really got me thinking about moving it on and having something else without the associations. The 0018v in particular I have been playing a lot at my local store over the last few months and I keep thinking 'I'll just do it' and then bottling it for some reason. The only thing really keeping me from doing so is that there was a time I really loved the Fylde, and also that it's not easily replaced if I regret selling it, but I have this 'gut' feeling that I might not ever feel the same about it. Sorry for the super long post, and the emotional content, but I woke up this morning and just felt like I had to share these thoughts with some sympathetic people! What do you think guys?
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Post by earwighoney on May 31, 2015 8:47:04 GMT
Hello Ben, First of all, here's a pat on the back/man hug. I can't imagine what you have gone through and the amount of guts it must have taken to write such a post. FWIW, I believe it's good to get things out of one's system (years of bottling/repressing things haven't done me any good). Whatever decision you may want to make about the Fylde, I'd advocate getting a new guitar, the 00-18V (for a bit there is this) sounds like a fine choice. The Martin 00 body size is growing to be my favourite now for comfort and sound. Not to bestow consumerism too much but a new guitar can be an enjoyable lift! Good luck my friend, Shubs
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Post by Martin on May 31, 2015 8:52:50 GMT
I think you're right. You've had issues with the Fylde for such a long time, and now associate it with a bad time in your life. It's only a guitar, and if it doesn't 'feel right', for whatever reason, move on to something else. The links it has with your recent past may make changing it cathartic for you. I hope things continue to improve for you too
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Post by jackorion on May 31, 2015 9:03:34 GMT
Thanks guys! earwighoney - I did debate just flat out buying the 0018v with the money I received from the divorce, but I ended up overhauling my recording setup with a new Mac and UA interface which was something I 'needed' more than another guitar! I did sell my car to fund that purchase though so I suppose I still haven't 'technically' spent any divorce money (well, apart from on a week in Marrakech!) Martin - I think it will be cathartic, but I'm also worried that I'll end up regretting it once the dust has settled so to speak. As it happens I'm changing my bank account to Santander this week and I see they have a credit card with 23 month 0%.... Tempting.
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Post by ocarolan on May 31, 2015 9:38:38 GMT
jackorion - Hi Ben - well done for writing that - not easy - a genuine "I woke up this morning...." blues post. Having listened to your recently posted songs I wondered if those, and ones yet to come, might not be quite enough to help you come to terms with your situation, and was half anticipating some Fylde decisions having to be taken. The guitar seems to have become almost a physical metaphor for a very up and (especially) down period in your life. If playing it brings the bad stuff to the forefront of your mind that is not great. Whether it would continue to do so over time, then neither of us could say - you may well return to it in the months/years to come with different feelings predominating, or you may not. It may, however, be just the right guitar on which now to write further "therapeutic" songs to help acknowledge your feelings...? Moving it on is a tempting option, particularly if there were something else that would complement your Martin, and bring some new inspiration. There's no telling whether you'd regret having parted with it later on, but it is a possibility. Having played it, I know what a lovely instrument it is... Big decision making may not ideal at such a time as this - would simply stashing it away for a year or so be an option, and reassessing then; or sooner if you felt able? In short, I don't know what I'd do in such a situation, but you did ask for thoughts! Hope the decision making doesn't become a major problem in its own right - keep writng those songs and getting your music heard. Are you playing "out" much lately Ben? As always, all the best to you! Keith
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Post by jackorion on May 31, 2015 10:31:26 GMT
Hi Keith,
Thanks for the reply - funnily enough the issues I'm having with the Fylde are not so much about coming to terms with my current situation, I'm actually much, much happier than I have been for a long time at the moment, and, yes, I am playing 'out' a fair amount at the moment (although my three weeks of illness knocked that on the head for a little bit!).
The new songs that have come to me are, I actually feel, very optimistic, and about the future rather than the past but I'm not sure I really want to go into that here - put it this way, my current recordings are not my 'Blood On The Tracks' or 'Pink Moon'!! It's not really about moving the Fylde on because it's painful being reminded of what's happened, it's more that the guitar has just lost something to me now, and I'm sure that a large part of that is the subconscious and conscious associations it has with the last two years. In fact I have a couple of friends who are convinced that the initial issue I had with the 'mystery buzz' was me subconsciously realising that something was wrong within my marriage and 'projecting' it on to the guitar that represented some part of that marriage to me.
I also think part of the equation is that, leading up to the time in which I ordered the guitar, and throughout owning it, I almost lost the love and excitement of discovering new music and new things and started to focus on a narrow band of music and pastimes in general, and, in a strange way, that mindset is almost 'built in' to the guitar - I feel that it does a couple of things exceptionally well but isn't the most versatile instrument; my Martin on the other hand seems to do everything very well, without really excelling at anything - it strums, it flatpicks, it fingerpicks, it handles low and normal tunings with ease, the pickup works really well etc etc. I can't help but wonder if a part of me was looking for a specialist guitar in order to narrow my own horizons...
The Fylde was my main guitar for a year or so when I closed my mind to writing and many other things - my Martin was my main guitar for a very creative period several years ago, and has been at hand whilst I've been finding my creative way again - I feel like it's 'my' guitar. It might not be technically as 'good' as the Fylde but it is mine.
I'm not planning on making any rash decisions, I've considered options such as loaning the guitar to a friend who really needs a good instrument, leaving it at my parents house for a month or two, or just keeping it in the case and getting it out now and then to see if anything has changed - once or twice I have sat down with it an denjoyed a good half an hour or DADGAD noodling, but then I return to the Martin and just feel 'better', I can't really explain.
I think your comment that it has become a physical representation of a period in my life that, looking back on now with the benefit of hindsight, was a very odd time for me, where I realise now that I lost something of myself.
The reason I'm drawn to the 0018v is that, when I have played it, I feel at home, but also that it gives me something different to my OM. Although, right now, I also think I'd be really happy with just my current Martin, and not have the distraction of 'looking for a new guitar' and maybe just stashing the Fylde away, or selling it and stashing the money away for a rainy day guitar that catches me by surprise...
Hmmm... Must be something about rainy sunday mornings and black coffee that's putting me in a philosophical mood!
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Post by ocarolan on May 31, 2015 10:54:04 GMT
Yup, very philosophical reply Ben, and one which helps a lot in understanding more clearly where you're at right now, thanks. I think that the idea of lending the guitar for a while to a deserving friend is an excellent one - I've done this in the past on a couple of occasions with instruments that were getting less attention than they deserved. I did find it helpful to me in finding out if I was happy not having them around. Rainy where you are? Looks like it's heading my way right now, having had a sunny start. I'd have another coffee if I were you! Keith
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Post by Deleted on May 31, 2015 11:01:35 GMT
Oh Jack, I feel your pain more than you can imagine. I'm not sure I have any advice I can offer that hasn't already been said. I have a guitar (the one in my photo) that has strong memories of the time when I was with my wife. You can even download the first Brook magazine and read all about my wife and I commisioning it together. And now that we are not together any more the guitar, like your Fylde, has strong associations with a particular period in my life. However, the guitar has given me a lot of new pieces, and still continues to inspire. I have thought recently about moving it on, but have come to the conclusion that I love it too much. And I still remember the time it was commissioned with great fondness. I know it is a difficult time going through a separation. I just try to hold on to the memories of all the lovely things that happened whilst we were together. Your ex must have been quite supportive to have encouraged you to commission a guitar on your honeymoon. I am only just beginning to move on myself, but I still have cherished memories that will stay with me no matter what the next chapter of my life brings. And my guitar has seen me through some of the darkest moments of my life. I think if you can afford to just store your Fylde for a little while you may find that in time you both heal, and you will enjoy being re aquanted with each other. New guitars always have little issues, but these can be fixed. You will be amazed at what the guys at Brook can do for you if you were to take it to them. Best wishes, and a big man hug coming your way from me Robbie
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Post by vikingblues on May 31, 2015 12:55:37 GMT
Hey Ben - a painful story and well done for having the guts to put it on record like that. It's good to hear that you're on an upward slope into being happier. I cannot begin to know just how bad a place you found yourself in - I can try and imagine and know that I would be a wreck in such a circumstance.
It is a complex question with the Fylde. It is impossible to ever no for sure there will be no regrets. I do have a suspicion from my own experience that once you find flaws and dissatisfaction in a guitar it's unlikely that it will return to being a favourite. That seed of doubt seems to spread and grow. But it's not a certainty.
I haven't had that sort of problem with an acoustic guitar thankfully but I did have a Tokai "Les Paul" Custom which turned, several years back, within the space of a couple of weeks from being my favourite guitar ever to being one I couldn't bear to play and also couldn't even bear to listen to on old recordings I'd made. Oddly when I let someone else play it at that time I could hear how good it sounded in their hands - it just didn't sound good in mine any more. It never made it back into my affections, was sold, and I have never had regrets.
That lending idea seems to be a good one. An effective half way house to trying to get a gut feeling for what should happen.
Best wishes to you on all counts anyway.
Mark
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Post by Andy P on May 31, 2015 15:59:32 GMT
Hi Ben I can absolutely see where you're coming from on this. I wonder if your ongoing dissatisfaction with the way the Fylde was performing was an expression of for what in hindsight was a less than happy marriage? That may well be pop psychology bollocks! My gut reaction is that the associations you feel with the Fylde are unlikely to be wiped out. Having said that, if you do sell it, you'll probably always have a few regrets. Lending it out for a while seems a good idea. Glad you're feeling more content
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Post by andyhowell on May 31, 2015 17:18:22 GMT
Well, that was certainly some post. I am tempted to say — first — that the new songs you have written should be locked at again in six months or so when you are well on the way to healing. have been there myself!
As for the Fylde. Well, I can see the problem. I have guitars I used to love and seldom play now. The question is whether to get rid of them. Personally, I never like the idea of giving up a new guitar but it's not a rule!
I see a few possibilities.
Firstly, just leave the thing aside on a stand or attached to a wall — just don't leave it in a case. Who knows, you might just come back to it in a year or so's time — and I bet you will beguiled you didn't sell it.
Secondly, Just sell it and content yourself with the Martin.
Thirdly, sell the Fylde — no problems there — and invest in a luthier build project. That should keep you occupied!
But mostly, follow your intuition and do what you feel you should — with one proviso, that you don't look back.
Guitars should inspire. But if they don't anymore, well ....
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Post by jackorion on Jun 1, 2015 1:28:20 GMT
Thanks for the support folks!
Sat down and played the Fylde today, along with my Martin. It's still a good guitar, and it plays nice and the neck fits in the left hand well. It's actually a little more versatile than I give ti credit for, it can be strummed but the mids can get in the way a bit.
Plugged them both in to my schertler acoustic amp and remembered instantly why I haven't been gigging the fylde - the pickup really overemphasises the low end, so I need to do something about that. Was thinking that if I get a pickup I like the sound of in there and start playing it out, maybe the Fylde will start to feel like part of ym new life and not part of my old one...
Incidentally I'm glad people are listening to and enjoying my new songs but, for the record, they aren't about my divorce or my ex-wife, so please don't read too much into them as 'therapy'!
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Post by ocarolan on Jun 1, 2015 8:07:15 GMT
K&K. Keith
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Post by jackorion on Jun 1, 2015 8:27:42 GMT
K&K. Keith Ha, a k&k installation was what made me notice the 'mystery buzz' last year in the first place! I'm not particularly a fan of the k&k I have to say, for some reason they just don't work for me, I find them to not be very 'clear'.
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Post by ocarolan on Jun 1, 2015 8:47:35 GMT
K&K. Keith Ha, a k&k installation was what made me notice the 'mystery buzz' last year in the first place! I'm not particularly a fan of the k&k I have to say, for some reason they just don't work for me, I find them to not be very 'clear'. Oooh, best not go there again then! Keith
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